i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
I just gargled with NyQuil
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
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