i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
Randomize
