He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
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