If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
