I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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