I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Randomize
