Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
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