Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
