thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
He called his prostate his "boner button".
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize
