I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
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