I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
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