"it" just moved
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
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