Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
