I want to make a zoo with you.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
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