Operation Purity has been aborted
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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