I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
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