Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Randomize
