her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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