Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
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