Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
Randomize
