She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
Randomize