guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
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