C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
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