my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
