Can Purell be used as lube?
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Randomize
