Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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