Can i not drive my cunt home
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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