so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Randomize
