therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Randomize