If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
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