you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
