David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
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