What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
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