i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
Randomize
