belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Randomize
