The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
I asked a girl to buy her a drink, she had I have a boyfriend, so I said, well i have a goldfish, she said what? I replied, oh I'm sorry I thought we were talking about shit that doesnt matter.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
Randomize
