I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
There's even glitter on my cock...
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
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