its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
Top reasons to NOT leave jessica to her own devices : 1. Drinking becomes a competitive sport ( in which she is the only one competing) 2.big girl words= no worky 3. Whiskey refuses to be a good friend (as much as she insists ). 4. Waking up at six a.m. still in her swim suit is super awkward. 5. It isn't a fun game to figure out which person she gave her number to and 6. Yesterdays eyeliner doesn't look good today.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Randomize
