its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
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