So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
do herpes really smell.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
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