I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize