I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Randomize
