It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
