If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Randomize
