I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
i came on her dog
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
