My friends, they love my intelligence
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize
