yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Randomize