I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
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