I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize