i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
